Wednesday, April 13, 2005

For every thing there is a season

a time to change, a time to live, a time to die, a time to love.
Seems that change is in the air for a lot of us. My beloved sister is building a house and selling her old one, my mother is checking into buying property on the east coast, and my family is moving to a new location.
What is going on? Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the biggest change. The angel babe has started on solids.
This is an exciting time for all of us. I find that my life is reflected in the day to day lessons that my babe learns. For example, the other day she learned that objects have permanence. Now while this may not seem like a really big deal, in baby world, it is MAJOR. For her it means that her favorite fat duck (which by the way has a very annoying quack and can only be turned off by standing on one foot while closing one eye and doing the hokey pokey *who makes this stuff*) actually goes somewhere when she drops it. What this means for me is this: babe drops toy, mom picks it up...babe drops toy, mom picks it up...babe drops toy, mom picks it get the picture. Babe is amused, mom is not. But what this also means on a grander scale is that she has learned about loss, evidenced by the fat duck going bye bye for now.
I hate that she has to learn this lesson. In fact, I grieve for all of us. My sister is leaving the first house she ever purchased. There has to be some sadness and nostalgia in that. What a special place it has been. It brought to this family, stability, a place for family gatherings, and for me a place of refuge that I utilized more than once. I am not saying that her new place won't have all the same qualities but that what we experienced there, the memories we made there have to be left there. My mother is leaving behind a life she spent many years building. It brought stability and a place for refuge for all of her children for as long as any of us can remember. My family is moving from our sweet spot that was our refuge and our first attempt at stability.
So where does that leave us? Perhaps in spite of our feelings of loss and because of our knowledge of object permanence we can forge a new stabilty and refuge. It is from knowledge that we experience and from wisdom that we grow. May we all have the wisdom to make the choices that will create a safe, stable "sweet spot" for all of us. I love you all. Yvette

picture of the fat duck to follow soon :}